but it has actually made me more wise.

You could say that without the rain,

you’d take for granite days the sun shines.

I’ve manipulated my way to personal gains,

by feeding victims full of bullshit and lies.

Those who love me the most are now insane,

due to me enforcing their screams and cries.

I did all of this while feeling no shame,

or wondering how I’ve managed to survive.

Just know when we meet and you hear my name,

there’s a devil behind this angels’ disguise.”

keep me up through the night.

They battle with such spite,

until one wins the fight.

Then it screams in my head,

“HEY! The other one’s dead.”

“Write me down instead!”

“I want to be read!”

So I write down the word.

Then another battle’s stirred,

and I just wish it were,

the final thing I heard.

Can you relate to what I mean?

Am I singled out with this disease?

I just wish someone could see,

how hard it is to be me,

when I feel like I can’t take,

another word and start to hate,

my gift… my life… my fate…

Blessing or curse? You can debate.”

My vision is blurred as I stare at your curves.

This is a little obsured but while driving I swerved,

then managed to hit a curb, but I wasn’t injured.

A body like that, I’m sure, has to be insured.

It makes me feel reassured that God exists for sure,

but I’ve come to observe that nothing good could emerge,

from something so pure that caused thoughts so impure.

I give you my word that I could NEVER deserve,

the honor, or ever earn, your heart in return,

but back to those curves… I’m still so unsure…

Is it possible you were made by the devil on your birth?

Did God create an Angel? Or did the devil get a turn?

 PERFECTION could be a curse is the one thing I’ve learned!”

In front of total strangers…

A man grabs his significant other by the hands. He gazes into her eyes and loses himself for a moment.

Then…

 He remembers his purpose… He remembers his one reason for being on this planet… It’s time…

He stares gently into her angelic eyes. His hearts pounding. It’s now or never.

He says, “It’s considered chivalrous and basically customary for a man to get down on one knee before he proposes.”

He gets down on one knee… Her heart starts thumping harder than his…

He says, “but before you freak out, I’m not proposing!”

Her heart rate calms, yet she’s overwhelmed with confusion… “What the hell is he doing then?” She asks herself.

He speaks again… ” A proposal basically means a suggestion and I’m not going to suggest that you spend the rest of your life with me, which is why I’m getting down on both knees.”

She’s more confused now than before… What the hell is he doing then?

He speaks again… ” I’m on both knees now because I’m not proposing that you marry me,” He pauses…

He takes a deep breath and says… “I’M BEGGING YOU TO!”

“I’m down on both knees because I’m begging you to marry me and spend the rest of our lives together! It’s you. You’re the one! You always have been & always will be…

So please… I’M BEGGING YOU… WILL YOU MARRY ME?”

There’s a moment of silence in which he’s worried she’s going to say no…

That moment was simply her thought process catching up. In those few seconds she’s stuck in awe! Every single love story she’s read… Every romantic movie she’s seen… Every heartfelt story she’s heard… None of them could compare to how truly beautiful what she had just witnessed happened to be.

It was the most breath-taking, romantic, chivalrous, thoughtful, and life altering action she had ever heard of…

Actually, it was beyond that. She couldn’t even fathom something this heartfelt in her imagination.

As far as her answer went… Could you say NO to that?!?!?

When you removed my heart you left my chest open,

effortlessly shattered it and destroyed my emotions,

leaving me drowning in tears as deep as the ocean.

Broken hearts have no cure… There’s no magical potion.

There’s no ointment to treat… There’s no self-healing lotion.

Nor is there one to make you give total devotion.

If there’s a symbol of “LOVE” I’d just hand you the token.

I thought I couldn’t break but I guess you were the chosen,

to ruin my world and set all of this into motion.

I feel like I’m crushed but at least now I have spoken…

My mind, heart, and soul all feel like they’re broken!

 Every night that I can’t watch you fall asleep while I hold you in my arms…

Every morning that I can’t wake up next to you…

Every day that I can’t kiss your soft, perfect, luscious lips…

Every minute that I can’t gaze into your beautiful eyes…

Every second that I can’t tell you how much I love you…

I LIVE IN HELL!!!

I can’t have you in this life! If I can’t spend eternity with you in Heaven, then it’s the same as being in hell!!!

Either way… I’M ETERNALLY FUCKED!!!

I awaited the existence of a distant surprise.

The passion was relentless and couldn’t be measured by size.

As far as your scent went, it set me on fire deep inside.

I knew in this exact minute that you had to be mine.

Even though ignorance is bliss, falling so hard just isn’t wise.

Every single one of my senses fooled me and told me lies.

This might sound twisted, but I knew you’d create my demise,

leaving me full of resentment and hiding behind a disguise.

I was still oblivious to the pain and had already made up my mind.

Even though I knew it meant heartache I needed you at the time,

but after all of this bullshit… I wish I could just press re-wind.”

but next you found my pain button and just thrusted a punch.

I heard the crunch, felt sharp pain, and knew it was crushed,

and left on, simply leaving me hurt and stuck in a rut,

which was such a disappointment, we’ve been through so much.

You had me from the first time that I busted a nut.

Over time our love slowly just decimated to lust.

We lost trust, which happens to be an absolute must.

When you’re in love there’s no limit! Enough is never enough,

but the past few years have just defined the word rough.

I won’t do it any longer! I refuse to still be your crutch,

and hold you up! I’m stronger now and mentally tough.

I’ll leave you hungry for my love and I won’t be your lunch.

You used me for the last time you heartless fucking cunt.

I know you think I’m playing and you’re calling my bluff.

 This isn’t reverse psychology… I swear it isn’t a stunt.

I know this is blunt, but I’m so full of hate and disgust!

I’m done BITCH! Fuck off… Go to hell, and good luck!

I’m scared… I’m anxious… Yet, I’ve never felt so alive.

My soul instinct is to just run, hide, and survive,

but I can’t… So I don’t… I’m frozen solid by your eyes.

Behind your eyes lies the ability to hypnotize.

They have the beauty and power to make smiles out of cries.

They have the passion to make a man stop and realize,

that he’s absolutely powerless no matter how hard he tries.

You have eye lashes that lash out and grab me deep inside.

One look and there’s no escape, there’s no where I can hide.

I’ll do ANYTHING you want, even if it costs me my pride.

You look like a woman… but you’re an Angel in disguise!

hand it over to you and let you FOREVER hold it,

but it’s too little too late and you already know it,

because about 4 years ago you reached in and then stole it.

I’d take out my soul, then let you sculpt it and mold it,

but it’s to late for that too, for that last kiss I’ve done sold it,

it belongs to you already and you don’t know that you own it,

maybe when my time comes, perhaps you’ll just let God loan it.

 I just keep running in circles attempting to find my purpose,

but I keep coming up empty handed in all of my searches.

The love I have for you just seems more and more worthless.

What the hell did I do in my life to ever deserve this?

I hate you because I love you and it constantly merges.

Having you for eternity is the only thing that could be worth this.

I just want to live my life hurtless, and feel I’ve totally earned it.

The pain is absolutely unbearable, but in my eyes YOU WERE PERFECT!